Engagement Mini Cherry Pies

Life has many milestones. From graduating college and grad school to baking my first cupcake to buying a dog, I had hit most of the important ones. But the biggie still remained. Following a year dating in college, the better part of a decade remaining really close friends, over two years of being back together, and moving halfway across the country to start a life together, it was time to make things with Robin super official.

After 10 years, these thought bubbles still hold (fortunately, my predilection for Lincoln beards does not).

With Robin's family medicine residency now over and her about to begin her new job as a full fledged smarty-pants Doctor, the timing seemed perfect to embark on the next phase of our relationship. Over the last ten years, I've been amazed watching her grow from a Freshman in college to the accomplished woman she is today, and I couldn't be prouder. In order to properly kick-off this momentous occasion in our lives, I decided to reimagine our first time baking together during our wonderfully awkward flirty but not together period circa 2011.

Would my cupcakey ode to our Cherry Pie of long ago be enough to convince her to spend the rest of her life with me, or did I totally misread this whole living together thing?

Engagement Mini Cherry Pies
Adapted from Table Spoon and Food Network

Delicious, if not overly romantic filling.

Servings: 12 mini pies
Time: 90 minutes

4 Pillsbury Refrigerated Pie Crusts
2 cups tart cherries
2 1/2 cups dark sweet cherries
1 cup granulated sugar
4 tbsp cornstarch
3/8 tsp-1/2 tsp pure almond extract
1 egg, whisked

I was going to prove myself to be a worthy homemaker, if it was the last thing I did!

1. Spend ten years being best friends with the awesomest, smartest girl around.
2. Realize that savings accounts are for losers, and buy a ring.
3. Freak out about how you're going to propose and almost ruin it until your sister calms you down and talks sense into you.
4. Look back on your fond memories of your first time baking together with your love.
5. Wait for her to go to work then try to make as little mess as possible in the kitchen for once.
6. Heat the cherries in a covered medium saucepan over medium-low heat until a fair amount of juice forms (about 5 minutes).
7. Sift the cornstarch and sugar together. Then stir it into the mix until well incorporated. 
8. Mix in the almond extract and continue cooking until it thickens, stirring frequently.
9. If it gets too thick, add small amounts of water. If it won't thicken up, add small amounts of cornstarch.
10. Let cool to room temp (or hide in the back of the fridge until she goes to sleep).
11. Wake up super early, but, whatever. It's not like you really slept much anyway.
12. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
13. Roll out the pie crusts and cut out twelve 4" discs. Press the discs into greased muffin tins so that they are just sticking out.
14. Fill each almost completely with your cherry mixture. 
15. Cut 6 thin strips to from the lattice of each pie and weave delicately. Press the ends of the lattice into the main crust to bring the two together. Marvel at how truly bad your lattice making abilities are, and make a heart-shaped one just in case.
16. Brush the tops with your egg mix.
17. Bake for 25-30 minutes until the crust is golden and the filling is bubbling. (Note: I found it quite helpful to pace around the kitchen while waiting. By 8 am, I had already logged over a mile in my kitchen alone.)
18. Somehow manage not to trip over the stairs or your dog and successfully carry the secretly purchased breakfast tray and its contents to your sleeping future Mrs..
19. Live happily ever after.

A Pictorial Proposal History

I had some painstaking choices to make. This proposal needed perfection and my lattice skills were not on point.

Oh no, the cappuccino foam was super flat! Proposal ruined!!!!

Luckily, I had two secret weapons in the book and the ring.

At last, a use for the My Mess Their Kitchen Game!

I'm sure Robin greatly appreciated not having to get out of bed for any of this.

Of course she said yes after those delicious pies. 

Maggie was especially thrilled that her parents were finally getting married (or maybe that there was food in the bed. We'll never know.)

My breakfast in bed proposal was a resounding success that will surely be spoken of for generations to come (I'm currently preparing the version I will tell as a crazy old man in front of a fireplace surrounded by our grandchildren during the holidays). The mini pies were just as delicious and even more whimsical than the first time we made the full-sized version, but, most importantly, she said yes! I drove myself crazy trying to figure out how to propose, but really all I had to do was pick something decidedly us. Unfortunately, proposing early in bed while living on the East Coast, meant we had to wait a while before we could spread the wonderful news, but we had some truly delightful cherry pies to keep us busy until then. 

Pi Day: Bayou Goo Pie

Saturdays in high school were spent on the battlefield. Legends were forged and Letterman Jackets were earned one equation at a time at Mu Alpha Theta math competitions across the state of Louisiana. The pressure was enough to snap your perfectly sharpened number two pencil and make you throw your TI-86 across the room (something I saw happen more than once).  The mathletes needed a leader, and as their president I was there to guide the way to glory.  I answered to only one person (aside from Pythagoras), and that was Mrs. Vedros. Whether putting up with a bunch of teenagers randomly serenading her with "You've Lost that Loving Feeling" at the Math State Convention Dance (yeah you wish you could have been there) or giving us moon pies to teach us about the importance of Pi Day, she was always there to make sure math won the day.

Some of the finest Mathletes the state of Louisiana has ever seen: (L to R) Eric, Thienan, Perry "P-Squared", and yours truly holding the massive trophy. I know it's hard to believe, but we were all single when this picture was taken.

Despite having the blog for over three years now, I had never properly celebrated Pi Day (aside from Kevin's write-up of Bumbleberry Pie). As this was the ultimate once in a century Pi Day extending all the way out to four decimal places (3.1415), I was not going to settle for another year of staring longingly at other people's pies on Facebook. I was going to recreate one of the greatest dessert concoctions from the pie Eden known as House of Pies that started it all and make my fellow mathletes proud.

Me in all my glory in high school (far left) receiving my outstanding math student award from Mrs. Vedros. Sadly my killer (and against the Catholic school dress code) side burns cannot be properly admired.

Bayou Goo Pie
Filling adapted from Real Cajun Recipes and Crust from All Recipes
Servings: 1 ~ 28.3" circumference Pie
Time: 20 minutes (plus setting in the fridge overnight or at least 2 hours)

Crust
1 1/2 cups finely ground graham cracker crumbs
1/3 cup sugar
6 tbsp butter, melted
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon

Filling and Topping
8 oz cream cheese, softened
1 cup powdered sugar
8 oz Cool Whip (separated)
1 (4 oz) box chocolate instant pudding
1 (4 oz) box vanilla instant pudding
2 cups milk
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup milk chocolate chips (separated)
Cocoa powder, sifted

Amazing graham cracker crust ready in under 15 minutes.  

Calculate the proper dish depth or be "forced" to eat the excess

1. Preheat the oven to 375 F.
2. Make the easiest crust ever by mixing the graham cracker crumbs, sugar, butter, and cinnamon together in a bowl.  Press the mix into a 9" pie tin. Bake for 7-10 minutes until golden and crisp.
3. Let cool to a level greater than or equal to how awesome you were in high school.
4. Make the first layer by combining the cream cheese, powdered sugar, and half of the cool whip using the whisk attachment of an electric mixer. 
5. Stir in half the chocolate chips and fill in the first layer of pie.
6. In a separate bowl, whisk the puddings, milk, and vanilla together. Stir in the chocolate chips, and let set for 5 minutes.
7. Create a pudding layer on top of the cream cheese layer. Cover and let set over night.
8. Top with the remaining cool whip and dust on some cocoa powder.
9. Relive your glory days in math club while enjoying a delightful slice.

The pie should be filled with peaks, like those that we fortunately did not reach in high school.

For being by far the easiest pie to make, this also just may have been the tastiest as it stacked up quite nicely to its House of Pies inspiration. The graham cracker crust was a departure from the standard pecan crust of a Bayou Goo pie, but it did invoke the childhood sensation of eating s'mores. Future attempts could involve using both graham cracker and pecan in the crust at 0.927 and 0.573 cups, respectively, for a beautiful golden ratio achieving the best of all worlds. Resting gloriously above that crust lies the amazing cream cheese and chocolate vanilla layers (reminiscent of Black and White Cupcakes). My only regret (other than not having a kiddie pool filled with it) was that my pie dish was not deep enough to allow for maximum enjoyment of all layers.

Attempts to calculate the rate of consumption were hindered by its exponentially growing nature due to optimal deliciousness.

While enjoying my Pi Day creation, I took some time to think back fondly on my Mu Alpha Theta days. Some of my best high school experiences were those weekends where my fellow square pegs and I got to forget about our lack of sports acumen at a school that best resembled Varsity Blues meets Friday Night Lights and come together to kick some scantron ass. From Thienan's and my attempts to see how many times we could karaoke Sk8er Boi on the bus before even our fellow geeks turned against us (the answer is about 3) to coming in second to what I am still convinced is the world's first sentient robot in FACTORIAL!, a Jeopardy like event at State, thanks to my encyclopedic movie knowledge to Perry and I pushing each other with our rivalry to be the smartest mathlete around driving us to new, mathier heights, I will never forget all the fun times we had just being ourselves. We were nerds, and we loved it. We even have the trophies to prove it.

Next up: Mole Day!

Two Mu Alpha Theta presidents partaking in some Quiz Bowl and most likely answering the question "Who is the most awesome mathlete of them all?".

Happy 6 Month Puppyversary: The Mag Pie

Six months ago, Robin and I made what is quite possibly the best choice we have ever made (yes, maybe even better than moving to Charleston)- we decided to get a dog. Having never owned a pet growing up (aside from a far less demanding turtle), Robin has made it her life's mission to remedy this now that she has her own oasis to call home. During medical school, she stuck to the lower maintenance feline variety of pets (the ruler of our kingdom, Swarley, and the shy but lovable Abby), but it was now time to add a more adventurous and demanding best friend to our family. As the petfinder emails exponentially increased in frequency, I knew there was no more waiting. It was time to buy a dog.

Our first encounter with Maggie. It was clear from the start that she was the one for us.

Maggie May was the first dog we met, and we instantly loved her. She was a calm, friendly dog, who could oddly displace her hips whenever she wanted to lay down. Following a walk around and checking out one other dog who sadly never stood a chance, she was ours. Over the last 6 months we have been endlessly amused watching wiggle-butt learn how to be a dog including understanding what a toy is, barking, chasing cats, burying bones, and endlessly begging for food. With Robin about to start nights and Maggie's 6 month adoption anniversary upon us, we decided to celebrate with a dog-centric day including a trip to the beach and Maggie's first pie (the ultimate sign of love between Robin and I).

Maggie enjoying quality backyard time

The Mag Pie
Adapted from The Three Dog Bakery Cookbook
Time: 30 minutes + time to set
Servings: 1 pie

Our most beautiful crust ever...

Crust
1 1/2 cups white flour
1/2 cup vegetable shortening
4-5 tbsp cold water

Filling
3 tbsp white flour
1/2 cup honey
2 cups skim milk
4 egg yolks
1/2 cup peanut butter
1 banana

Even Swarley decided to help out.

1. Buy a puppy. Wait 6 months.
2. Preheat the oven to 450 F.
3. Make the crust by cutting the shortening into the flour until it is the size of peas.  Add water 1 tbsp at a time until you get a workable ball.
4. Roll out the dough on a lightly floured surface then assemble it in a pie plate.
5. Bake for 10-12 minutes until golden. Let cool.
6. Make the filling by blending the flour, honey, milk, egg yolks, peanut butter, and banana together in a blender until smooth.
7. Pour the filling into a large saucepan and cook over medium until it begins to thicken. Let cool and pour over the crust. Refrigerate for at least an hour to let it set.
8. Prepare for never-ending grateful dog kisses.

The finished product, but who are we kidding, you're not reading this post to see pictures of food.

Initially, this recipe oddly called for parsley. Since Robin and I were fully intending to partake in the doggy desserty goodness, this was not gonna fly. Instead, we added peanut butter's natural friend the banana, and got a pie fit for human consumption. We enjoyed our doggie pie, but nowhere near as much as Maggie did. She scarfed up her slice in about 2 milliseconds then pushed her plate across the floor making sure she licked each and every last crumb off (this would become a recurring theme as she would spend the next several days pushing said plate toward me asking for more delicious pie). Finally, she helped herself to the remaining scraps on our plates before a well earned nap. I am pretty sure she's now convinced that lunch pie is a thing that's supposed to happen every day, but it was worth it to spoil her for all the joy she's brought these last few months (even if she does insist that my side of the bed is her spot).

Maggie's Day of Fun

Our pre-pie workout on the beach. Judging by how my feet aren't even touching the ground, it is clear that I am the alpha in this relationship.

Having fun running free

Getting her palate ready for the pie goodness to come

Maggie waiting in anticipation of her pie. Her tail may have broken the sound barrier.

She insisted on cleaning our plates for us as well. She's such a helpful dog.

Chocolate Chai Chess Pie

Our goal...

After an almost two year hiatus, the crazy pie train finally rides again! This time we’ve gone all the way to the east coast to break in our shiny new kitchen. And in honor of this momentous occasion, Terry has finally let me be a guest poster!

In my ongoing attempt to convince Terry that Charleston is the best city in the world and he should move here immediately, I knew that we should go with a Southern staple—chess pie. Our brand new house obviously deserved its own brand new pie book, so I bought Allison Kave’s First Prize Pies. Rather than a basic buttermilk or lemon chess pie, we decided to go with her chai chess pie (in honor of my brownness). We also went with the chocolate pie crust to complement the spiced filling.

Look at the awesome island we get to bake pies on! 

Chocolate Crust 

Servings: 1 double-crust 9" pie

1/2 cup whole milk
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
12 oz. all-purpose flour (chilled)
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter
1/4 cup rendered leaf lard (or additional butter)

1. Stir together vinegar and milk and refrigerate until ready to use
2.  On a clean flat surface (such as your new granite island!) or a shallow bowl, stir together flour, cocoa, sugar, and salt
3. Add butter (and lard if using) to the dry ingredients and cut the fat into the flour until the mixture has been reduced to pea-sized chunks
4. Spread the mixture out to expose as much surface area as possible, and drizzle half of the milk mixture over the flour
5.  Lightly toss the flour over the liquid, and then spread mixture out and repeat with remaining milk
6.  Cover dough tightly in plastic wrap and refrigerate it for at least 1 hour

Not the prettiest crust, but it does the job

Your goal is to have dough that will just hold together when pressed against the side of a bowl. We needed to add a few more splashes of milk to get the correct consistency. We’re also terrible at reading directions, and were confused when we had enough dough for two pies…

Filling

Ground spices 

Servings: 1- 9" pie

4 large eggs
3/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup chai tea mixture (we used tea powder, cinnamon, cloves, cardamom, allspice, orange peel and white pepper)
2 tbsp unbleached all-purpose flour
2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
1/4 tsp salt

1. Preheat the oven to 425°
2. Roll out the dough into a circle about 11cm in diameter and transfer it to a 9-in pie pan (or smush the dough into the pan with your fingers like an adult)
3. Blind bake the crust for 20 min until partially baked then let cool. Turn the oven down to 350°
4. Whisk the eggs and sugar together until light and fluffy
5. Whisk in the tea mixture, flour, butter, and salt
6. Pour the filling into the crust and baked 25-30 min until the filling has just set and is still slightly jiggly in the center
7.  Cool completely before serving.

Action shot 

In our attempts to figure out our new oven’s quirks, we accidentally overbaked the pie and passed the perfect gooey stage. Luckily the center still was the perfect consistency. Even so, the filling was a great spicy improvement on your standard chess pie, and was even better when it was cold. Next time I think I’d switch out the instant ice tea powder for ground black tea leaves to get a stronger tea flavor (though the iced tea was a nice tribute to the southern theme). We also topped our slices with freshly whipped cream, which I highly recommend.

Final product! Somehow it doesn't look like the picture in the book...

This actually ended up being one of our less successful pies. Turns out when you stop baking pies for two years, you forget about the simple things, like covering the outer crust and that pies continue to cook after you take them out of the oven. Luckily our new cookbook has a pie for each week of the year, so we will have plenty of practice ahead! That being said, you can never go too wrong with butter and sugar. Overall this was the perfect way to break in our new house (along with the obligatory champagne and dance party).

Rather than trying to cut slices with a plastic knife, we ate out of the pie plate like the grownups we are