Engagement Mini Cherry Pies

Life has many milestones. From graduating college and grad school to baking my first cupcake to buying a dog, I had hit most of the important ones. But the biggie still remained. Following a year dating in college, the better part of a decade remaining really close friends, over two years of being back together, and moving halfway across the country to start a life together, it was time to make things with Robin super official.

After 10 years, these thought bubbles still hold (fortunately, my predilection for Lincoln beards does not).

With Robin's family medicine residency now over and her about to begin her new job as a full fledged smarty-pants Doctor, the timing seemed perfect to embark on the next phase of our relationship. Over the last ten years, I've been amazed watching her grow from a Freshman in college to the accomplished woman she is today, and I couldn't be prouder. In order to properly kick-off this momentous occasion in our lives, I decided to reimagine our first time baking together during our wonderfully awkward flirty but not together period circa 2011.

Would my cupcakey ode to our Cherry Pie of long ago be enough to convince her to spend the rest of her life with me, or did I totally misread this whole living together thing?

Engagement Mini Cherry Pies
Adapted from Table Spoon and Food Network

Delicious, if not overly romantic filling.

Servings: 12 mini pies
Time: 90 minutes

4 Pillsbury Refrigerated Pie Crusts
2 cups tart cherries
2 1/2 cups dark sweet cherries
1 cup granulated sugar
4 tbsp cornstarch
3/8 tsp-1/2 tsp pure almond extract
1 egg, whisked

I was going to prove myself to be a worthy homemaker, if it was the last thing I did!

1. Spend ten years being best friends with the awesomest, smartest girl around.
2. Realize that savings accounts are for losers, and buy a ring.
3. Freak out about how you're going to propose and almost ruin it until your sister calms you down and talks sense into you.
4. Look back on your fond memories of your first time baking together with your love.
5. Wait for her to go to work then try to make as little mess as possible in the kitchen for once.
6. Heat the cherries in a covered medium saucepan over medium-low heat until a fair amount of juice forms (about 5 minutes).
7. Sift the cornstarch and sugar together. Then stir it into the mix until well incorporated. 
8. Mix in the almond extract and continue cooking until it thickens, stirring frequently.
9. If it gets too thick, add small amounts of water. If it won't thicken up, add small amounts of cornstarch.
10. Let cool to room temp (or hide in the back of the fridge until she goes to sleep).
11. Wake up super early, but, whatever. It's not like you really slept much anyway.
12. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
13. Roll out the pie crusts and cut out twelve 4" discs. Press the discs into greased muffin tins so that they are just sticking out.
14. Fill each almost completely with your cherry mixture. 
15. Cut 6 thin strips to from the lattice of each pie and weave delicately. Press the ends of the lattice into the main crust to bring the two together. Marvel at how truly bad your lattice making abilities are, and make a heart-shaped one just in case.
16. Brush the tops with your egg mix.
17. Bake for 25-30 minutes until the crust is golden and the filling is bubbling. (Note: I found it quite helpful to pace around the kitchen while waiting. By 8 am, I had already logged over a mile in my kitchen alone.)
18. Somehow manage not to trip over the stairs or your dog and successfully carry the secretly purchased breakfast tray and its contents to your sleeping future Mrs..
19. Live happily ever after.

A Pictorial Proposal History

I had some painstaking choices to make. This proposal needed perfection and my lattice skills were not on point.

Oh no, the cappuccino foam was super flat! Proposal ruined!!!!

Luckily, I had two secret weapons in the book and the ring.

At last, a use for the My Mess Their Kitchen Game!

I'm sure Robin greatly appreciated not having to get out of bed for any of this.

Of course she said yes after those delicious pies. 

Maggie was especially thrilled that her parents were finally getting married (or maybe that there was food in the bed. We'll never know.)

My breakfast in bed proposal was a resounding success that will surely be spoken of for generations to come (I'm currently preparing the version I will tell as a crazy old man in front of a fireplace surrounded by our grandchildren during the holidays). The mini pies were just as delicious and even more whimsical than the first time we made the full-sized version, but, most importantly, she said yes! I drove myself crazy trying to figure out how to propose, but really all I had to do was pick something decidedly us. Unfortunately, proposing early in bed while living on the East Coast, meant we had to wait a while before we could spread the wonderful news, but we had some truly delightful cherry pies to keep us busy until then. 

Muffin Mondays: Dark Chocolate Cherry Muffins

Recently, I began celebrating the soon to be worldwide holiday known as Muffin Mondays. Delusions of grandeur filled my head as I decided to embark on a journey of two delicious muffiny treats to great my coworkers in the morning.  Unfortunately, my strawberry rhubarb yogurt muffins turned in to an unmitigated disaster, but, then, as if smiled upon by the baking gods, a Muffin Monday Miracle occurred. My Dark Chocolate Cherry Muffin recipe which was supposed to yield 2 dozen muffins entered some weird wormhole and produced 48 delicious breakfasty treats (I may have been a little suspicious given the insane amount of flour it called for, but I wasn't about to let something like math or numbers stop me!).

Screw you, strawberry rhubarb suckins!

Dark Chocolate Cherry Muffins
Adapted from All Recipes
Servings: 24 muffins (adjusted to actually be 24)
Time: 40+ minutes (how fast can you chop cherries?)

This might take a while...

2 1/3 cups  all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup sour cream
1/2 cup milk
1/3 cup vegetable oil
2 eggs, beaten
1 tsp almond extract
1 1/2 cups fresh dark cherries, pitted and chopped
1 cup dark chocolate chips
Sliced almonds (optional)

Chocolate and fruit, what a novel idea that has certainly never been tried before!

1. Attempt to make strawberry rhubarb muffins. Fail miserably.
2. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
3. Whisk the flour, sugar, cooca powder, baking powder, baking soda and salt together in a large bowl.
4. Mix the sour cream, milk, vegetable oil, eggs and almond extract in a bowl until well blended.
5. Slowly add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients and stir until just incorporated.
6. Fold the cherries and dark chocolate chips into the batter.
7. Fill lined muffin tins 1/2- 2/3 full. Sprinkle on almond slices if desired.
8. Bake for 15-20 minutes or until the toothpick test comes back clean (beware of false negatives from the melted chocolate chips).
9. Let the tins cool on wire racks for 5 minutes. Then remove the muffins and allow them to finish cooling on the racks.
10. Realize the second type of muffin isn't necessary because these are absurdly awesome.

Souped up almond model. Now if I can just figure out where the NOS goes...

Normally, I don't go for chocolate muffins (chocolate is for my unhealthy lattes and not my fruit-filled morning treats), so these combo fruit/chocolate muffins were the perfect way to help me ease into an exciting and scary new lifestyle. These were vaguely reminiscent of chocolate liqueur cherries thanks to the almond extract, but the real heart of this breakfast was the abundance of juicy cherries intermingling with the decadent dark chocolate that made all that chopping worth it. Venturing away from my normal muffin comfort zone proved to be the right choice, as these may have been the most deserving entry to Muffin Mondays yet.

The inner workings of a muffin are almost as complicated as those of the human body (at least I imagine mine is filled with chocolate and fruit).

The Oatmeal Cookie of Destiny

You make me want to be a better baker.

Every now and then I reach a moment of complete and total clarity while baking (this is likely just a minor diabetic seizure, but we'll treat it as an epiphany) when I know I've made something addictive that propels my desire to one day actually open up Terry's Crafty Confectionery Crafts. This devilish oatmeal cookie supersaturated with cherries, white chocolate, pecans and Heath bar bits is deserving of its own illegal street corner trading. No longer will the oatmeal cookie be relegated to banishment in the corner as that kind of healthy looking cookie with the weird texture! It's ready for the big time.

The Oatmeal Cookie of Destiny

Adapted from Cookie Madness

Servings: 24+ cookies

Time: 30 minutes

1 cup unsalted butter, softened

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1 cup brown sugar, packed

2 large eggs

2 tsp pure vanilla extract

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

2 cups quick cooking oats

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

1 cup cherries, quartered and pitted

1 cup white chocolate chips

1 cup Heath bar bits

1/2 cup honey toasted pecans, chopped

1. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
2. Whisk the flour, oats, baking soda and salt together in a large bowl. Set aside.
3. Cream the butter and sugars together using a stand mixer at medium speed until light and fluffy.
4. Add the vanilla and eggs one at a time until fully incorporated. 
5. Stir in the flour mixture at low speed until just combined.
6. Incorporate the remaining ingredients with a rubber spatula until evenly distributed.
7. Scoop the dough in 2-3 tsp sized chunks onto baking sheets lined with parchment paper. Leave ~2 inches between cookies.
8. Bake for 10-13 minutes or until browned.
9. Let cool on the baking sheets for 3 minutes to crisp up the bottoms then move to wire racks.
10. Pair with stout-like beer.

I tend to get overzealous when it comes to proper cookie dough proportions and spacing.

This cookie has so much going on. The truly ridiculous conglomeration of cookie fillings could stand as a memorable cookie with one or two ingredients removed, but when properly assembled this cookie becomes a force of nature (or some horrible post apocalyptic nature in a world where the only remaining resource is sugar). The cherries were my personal favorite as they had a freshness and natural sweetness to counterbalance the other slightly more decadent aspects. The pecans supplied a nice crunch, while the white chocolate further emphasized the richness and the Heath bar bits added a nice caramel finish.

Who needs cookies and milk? Surprise and delight your kids with these oatmeal cookies paired with an imperial stout or brown ale (because, really, is there anything more hilarious and adorable than drunk children?). 

These cookies helped appease a packed townhouse since Nancy was over helping cooking dinner and Jaime and Jess were escaping their air-condition deprived home (It was only 92 inside their place. I think they just wanted an excuse to see me.). Thankfully, all these people were present to prevent me from eating the entire batch and then knowing shame. More importantly, Jaime brought along appropriate stouts and brown ales to pair with the cookies.

Refugee Jess enjoys a cookie to forget her air-conditioner woes. 

Heather and the Three Pineapple Upside Down Birthday Cupcakes

I've decided that all my friends should have birthdays in the near future because I'm thoroughly enjoying opening up Terry's Crafty Confectionery Crafts (working title) for doling out birthday treats (see Alexis and the Baked Alaska). Up today is Heather, the physical therapist/ former collegiate goalie and expert potato stuffer who often enjoys plundering my baked goods, falling asleep on my couch and laughing at my cursing and pacing during Saints games.

Three varieties for triple the birthday fun!

Heather gave me several starting points for her birthday. She likes pineapple upside down cake, cupcakes and cream cheese frosting. After the hamster on a wheel that controls my brain got spinning, I came up with the ultimate solution: 3 distinctly delightful pineapple upside down cupcakes. The first would be a mini version of a pineapple upside down cake, while the next two would be more of your garden variety cupcakes with pineapple filling and a cherry cream cheese or whipped cream frosting.

Pineapple Upside Down Cupcakes 
Adapted from TasteofHome.com
Servings: 24 cupcakes
Time: 45 minutes (plus all the ridiculous extra steps I put in)

6 tbsp butter, cubed
1 cup packed light brown sugar
2 tbsp light corn syrup
Pineapple slices
Maraschino cherries
3 eggs
2 cups sugar
1 cup canola oil
1 cup sour cream
1 tbsp vanilla extract
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
Frostings (see below)

1. Preheat the oven to 350.
2. Line the bottoms of a cupcake tin with wax paper and grease the sides well.
3. Melt the butter in a saucepan over low heat. Stir in the brown sugar and corn syrup and stir over medium heat until the sugar dissolves.
4. In a separate bowl, beat the eggs and sugar together until thickened and lemon colored.
5. Beat in the oil, sour cream and vanilla until smooth.
6. Sift the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt together in a separate bowl.
7. Add the dry ingredients gradually to the wet ingredients and mix well.
8. Spoon the butter/brown sugar mixture onto the waxed paper in the cupcake tin.
9. Place a pineapple slice on top of the butter and fill the hole with a cherry.
10. Pour in the batter to fill the cup about 2/3 of the way.
11. Bake for 16-22 minutes or until the toothpick test comes back clean. Make sure you rotate once halfway through.
12. Let cool on a wire rack then top lightly with frosting (recipe follows).

A dollop of whipped cream covers up where I had to cut the pineapple.

These just might be the most adorable cupcakes I've made yet. They really are just a mini pineapple upside down cake, so you get all those same wonderful flavors in a convenient handheld package. The top (or bottom in this turvy topsy world) is phenomenal. The brown sugar and butter bakes into this perfect sugary layer that meshes spectacularly with the pineapple and cherry (In my ravenous haste, I ate the pineapple first and was left with a sad fruitless/sugarless cake.). My only gripe is that they aren't really a traditional cupcake. Where's the wrapper?!? So I remedied these feelings of not having truly made cupcakes to satiate my inner crazy by also changing things up for a more typical approach (if you count filling and two kinds of frostings as typical).

Pineapple Upside Down Cupcakes (Traditional)

So here's where it gets tricky, readers. If you want more of a traditional cupcake (one in a cupcake wrapper) then disregard steps 2, 3, 8 and 9 from above. Instead just make your batter and pour it into the lined tins. Then after baking, add in some pineapple filling (recipe follows) and garnish with frosting, chopped pineapple and a cherry.

Lining the bottoms with the brown sugar mixture results in a weird divided cupcake with the brown sugar stuck to the wrapper (which is why we skip these steps). Luckily I made a dozen without doing this.

My first attempt incorporated the butter/brown sugar glaze that usually sits on top of a pineapple upside down cake. Unfortunately, this hardened on the wrapper and caused a strange divide with the batter, so you essentially had two non-touching layers (and one very structurally unsound cupcake that would be condemned). I figured this might happen, so I also prepared some without the butteryness. They were absolutely incredible and a completely different experience from the original recipe allowing you to have two awesome and distinct desserts with minimal extra effort (plus the filling could be eaten by the gallon on its own so you should make it anyway). The cake itself had a somewhat crispy exterior (which I've noticed happens with the foil cupcake liners I've been using) that lent some nice texture to the inner moist cake and pineapple filling, while the frostings brought the sweetness to near dangerous levels of delectability (Danger Zone!).

Pineapple Filling
From Food.com
Servings: About 2 cups
Time: 20 minutes (plus chilling)

1/2 tsp salt
3 tbsp cornstarch
1/2 cup + 1 tbsp sugar
20 oz can crushed pineapple, in its own juice
3 tbsp butter

1. Combine the salt, cornstarch, salt and pineapple with juices in a heavy saucepan.
2. Bring the mixture to a boil over medium heat stirring constantly.
3. Let boil for 5 minutes while stirring until it thickens and no longer looks milky.
4. Remove from heat and stir in the butter until melted.
5. Let cool then refrigerate for at least an hour.

This seriously reminds me of some cake from McKenzie's growing up, but I have no idea what its name was (and it's driving me insane). Update: my mom came through in the clutch and remembered it's the Pineapple Delight.

My favorite part of all this cupcakery was definitely the pineapple filling. It instantly reminded me of this cake I used to eat at my grandmother's as a small child (which I sadly can't remember the name of, because I'd definitely spend a week living off of that cake if I knew what it was). Part of me wanted to hollow out the insides completely just to maximize the amount of pineapple.


Cherry Cream Cheese Frosting
From AmandasCookin.com
Servings: Enough for all the cupcakes
Time: 5 minutes (plus chilling)

16 oz cream cheese, softened
1 stick unsalted butter, softened
1/3 cup cherry pie filling
1 tsp almond extract
1 tsp vanilla extract
2-2 1/2 cups powdered sugar

1. Beat the butter and cream cheese together.
2. Add in the cherry pie filling, almond extract and vanilla extract and beat until the cherries are broken into small pieces (about 1-2 minutes).
3. Add the powdered sugar about 1/2 a cup at a time until you reach the desired consistency and sweetness.
4. Refrigerate for at least an hour to help the flavors develop.

I ended up making two frostings for these cupcakes- a cherry cream cheese and a whipped cream frosting. The whipped cream was a nice touch that most closely mimicked a true pineapple upside down cake, but wasn't exciting enough for my tastes (if you'd like to make it you can find a wonderful vanillay recipe for it here). The cherry cream cheese was definitely the way to go with either version of the cupcake. Cherry bits and the almond extract make this stand out from your usual cream cheese frosting (which is saying something because cream cheese frosting is already the greatest thing in the history of things). 

Good to know, cupcakes can have pictures taken of them with candles but NOT with fireworks.

I was extremely proud of these cupcakes and relieved since they helped ensure Heather would remain my friend and Archer watching companion at least until her next birthday. If I had to pick a favorite, it would be the traditional cupcake with cherry cream cheese frosting by a hair over the mini pineapple upside down cake (complete with cherry cream cheese frosting, of course). Heather made sure to sample each one to refrain from insulting the chef (and I appreciate her valiant efforts).

As always, purchase of 2 dozen cupcakes comes with a free sexy pineapple hat.

Since this took quite some time to put together, I made these over the weekend ahead of her actual birthday which is Tuesday (and led to her comically chiming in with "in two days!" during the happy birthday song).  Hopefully, she's resisted the severe temptation calling to her from her fridge and managed to save some for her actual birthday (I'm pretty sure I'd have to tie myself down to accomplish that level of self restraint). 

Happy Birthday, Heather!

Cherry Pie

Tonight I took over the kitchen of Robin, one of my friends from Rice. She took time off of her busy schedule of learning how to save lives to work on helping create super diabetes with me.  Back in college, we used to go to House of Pies every Sunday night and try a new delicious baked good. I always swore by the strawberry-rhubarb pie, but she insisted the cherry pie was the best. Since it was her kitchen, we decided we would go with cherry. Despite our initial reservations over making our own crust, this turned into one of the best pies I've ever had.

Pie Crust
From The Secrets of Baking by Sherry Yard
Servings: 2 crusts
Time: 90 minutes

2 sticks cold unsalted butter
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tbsp sugar
1 tsp salt
1/2 cup ice water
1/2 tsp vinegar

Yeah, all those little things are butter.

1. Cut the butter into 1 inch pieces and chill in the freezer for 15 minutes.
2. Sift the flour and sugar together in a bowl. Add in the butter and salt.
3. Using a pastry cutter, split the butter until it is pea sized.
4. Mix in a mixture of the ice water and vinegar  while stirring at low speeds until the dough forms. It should be tacky but not sticky (whatever that means, book).
5. Wrap the dough in plastic wrap (but don't squeeze it together) and chill for at least an hour.
6. Split the dough into two and shape one piece into a flat disc lightly knead it.
7. Lightly flour a work surface and roll the dough over it. Be sure to occasionally change directions to keep it round. The final product should be 1/4 inch thick and slightly larger than the pie pan. If you're having trouble keeping the crust together when rolling, you can cheat and just press it in the pie pan itself with your hand until it's the desired thickness (not that that's what we had to do...).
8. Roll out the other piece of dough and cut 8 pieces of varying length to form a lattice top.

This is a fairly easy but very tasty crust. The extra effort of making it over using frozen store crust is worth it, as this is crazy flaky (as you may have guessed it would be by the two sticks of butter).

Cherry Filling

Adapted From Food Network

Servings: 1 9 inch pie

Time: 20 minutes

2 cups tart cherries

2 1/2 cups dark sweet cherries

1 cup sugar

4 tbsp cornstarch

1/8 tbsp almond extract

1. Put the cherries in a covered medium saucepan over medium-low heat until a fair amount of juice has formed (about 5 minutes).
2. Mix the cornstarch and sugar together then stir into the cherries until fully incorporated.
3. Add in the almond extract and continue cooking over low heat until thickened. Be sure to stir frequently.
4. Let cool to room temperature.

Gooey deliciousness

Since you already have an hour of waiting for the crust to chill, you have the perfect opportunity for making the filling. Don't leave out the almond extract. It helps make this better and more interesting than your traditional cherry pie. Also, using a mixture of sweet and tart cherries keeps the pie from reaching any extremes. Just be careful not to eat it all after you taste it, or you'll have one sad little pie.

Cherry Pie

Crust and lattice 

Cherry pie filling

Coarse sugar

1. Preheat the oven to 375.
2. Pour the filling into the crust and spread out well. 
3. Top with the strips to form a lattice. Push the ends into the side crust to help connect.
4. Sprinkle coarse sugar (think sugar in the raw) over the lattice.
5. Bake for 45-50 minutes or until golden brown. Be sure to rotate once halfway through for even heating.

Use of a knife is recommended, but taking a giant bite also works.

Personally, I always found cherry pie to be a little boring, but this one really stands out. As I first noticed with my peach crepes, almond extract is a powerful background ingredient to help kick fruit mixtures up a notch. This pie was definitely worthy of a spot on House of Pie's menu. The only problem we ran into was that our crust was a little too flaky. Due to this, we weren't able to get very pretty slices, but your mouth certainly won't care. 

Top with homemade whipped cream (whipping cream, powdered sugar and vanilla mixed at high speed) or vanilla ice cream and serve.

Like I said, the slices weren't pretty. Fortunately, your mouth is not as shallow as your eyes are.

Now I'm ready to be a 1950s housewife.