Slow Cooker Butter Chicken Sliders

My first introduction to butter chicken came during one of my many pre-move visits to Charleston. While looking for proper sustenance, I was shocked to find that (thanks to her busy doctory schedule) the only safely edible thing Robin had in her fridge was some butter chicken that her mother had made for her. Fortunately for me and my tummy, my future mother-in-law is quite adept at making delicious Indian food, so I was in an amazing treat.

Following a long week of work, I wanted to welcome Robin back with this favorite comfort food of hers while giving it an American (and lazy) twist.

Slow Cooker Butter Chicken Sliders
Adapted from Kiwi and Bean
Time: 5-7 Hours
Servings: Happy hour amounts of sliders

So many spices

3-4 tbsp butter (pick how "healthy")
1 onion, diced
5 cloves glarlic, crushed
2 thumb-size pieces of ginger, peeled and grated
3 tsp garam masala
2 1/2 tsp cumin
1 tsp tumeric
1 tsp cayenne
15 oz coconut milk
5 oz tomato paste

Not pictured: mango chutney

2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken breast
1- 2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken thighs
1 tsp cornstarch
Salt to taste
Pepper to taste
Sriracha to taste
Red Cabbage, shredded
Jalapenos or other spicy pepper, sliced
Cilantro
Mango Chutney
Cucumbers, sliced
Slider Buns

The heart of butter chicken

1. Get really bored while your fiance is working out of town.
2. Melt the butter in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Sauté the onion until tender and translucent. Stir in the garlic and ginger. Cook until the onion are browned, stirring frequently to keep from burning. 
3. Coat with the garam masala, cumin, turmeric, and cayenne. Cook for another 1-2 minutes until fragrant. 
4. Pour in the coconut milk and tomato paste. Mix until smooth. Then bring to a boil. 
5. Transfer the sauce to a slow cooker along with the chicken.
6. Cook over low for ~ 5 hours until the chicken is very tender.
7. Remove the chicken and shred. 
8. Whisk the cornstarch into the sauce in the slow cooker, ramp the heat to high and let thicken. 
9. Return the chicken to the sauce and coat well. Add salt, pepper, and sriracha to taste. You'll likely need a lot of salt.
10. Assemble your sliders with chicken, red cabbage, jalapeno, cilantro, mango, chutney, and cucumbers on preferably toasted buns.
11. Be amazed at how much more amazing they taste the second day.

One day I'll use the book Robin gave me on food photography, so you can stop enjoying shadows in pics.

The veggie toppings provided wonderful freshness, flavor, and crispiness reminiscent of a banh mi, while the mango chutney added a nice hint of sweetness to keep the fire at bay. As with most slow-cooker made deliciousness, the results were even more amazing the second day once the flavors had a little more time to meld together. To make these even more awesome, I would either try to incorporate some yogurt into the mix or try to emulate a nice banh mi a little more by using char-grilled chicken instead of shredded (thus pretty much nullifying the entire recipe and its inherent laziness!). Despite some very minor room for improvement, these provided many days of magnificently tasty and spicy leftovers that I never found myself tiring of. More importantly, they seemed to satisfy and not offend Robin's love of butter chicken.

Farewell Cooking Tour: Bánh Mì School with Cafe TH's Minh Nguyen

The grand teacher was so proud of his pupil's accomplishment

Everyone kept asking me if there were places I had to visit one last time before leaving. What was I going to miss the most? The only place that came to mind (and that I visited at least twice a week this last month) was the char-grilled Vietnamese wonderland known as Cafe TH.

The story of how everyone falls in love with TH seems to always be the same. A friend brings them along after months of raving about it, and in short time the new TH fan is repeating the cycle and bringing in even more friends to succumb to owner Minh's unparalleled spirit and food (it's quite the grand pyramid scheme).

While I never got my name on a menu item like my TH-sires Trey and Scotty (of Trey Way and Gluttonous Ellis fame), I had a lot of great memories and meals there these past 3 years. Every Thursday, our friends would gather together for one of Minh's unbeatable 4-course prix fixe dinners (which we turned into 5 courses thanks to the Trey Way), but my fondest food memories involve the grand Saturday tradition I used to have when I lived a mere 2 minutes away for a year.

Each Saturday, I would wake up, work out, and travel to TH for the greatest bánh mì known to man, The Heart Throb, and then take the most glorious nap on the couch in front of the TV. This behemoth took everything that made bánh mì great and turbo charged it beyond safe levels. Double char-grilled pork combines with bacon, fried eggs, and the freshest ingredients in the best baguette this side of Paris for a satisfaction your stomach will never forget.

Before I left Houston, I wanted only one thing- to make my own Heart Throb. But in order to do that, I was going to have to learn the art of the bánh mì.

Bánh Mì School

All I was expecting from my bánh mì making request was watching Minh masterfully make sandwiches while telling me what makes them so damned delicious, but he had much greater things in store. I was going to learn about bánh mì by getting in the kitchen and making them myself. First up was watching Minh's padawan Maria assemble 6 sandwiches before I had time to blink. The skill was evident, and I had lofty expectations to meet.

Next up, we traveled to the kitchen where I got to live my dream of cooking like a professional chef. We needed fried eggs and bacon to complete our sandwich, and this hairnet wasn't gonna wear itself. I was a little worried that I overcooked the eggs as the pan was quite hot (and that I would commit some unforgivable health code violation), but the bacon came out perfect.

Minh knew better than to let me play with the majestic fire for the char-grilled pork, but he did let me play with his sharp knives and cut up the greatest food item known to man. It took everything in my power not to just shove it all in my mouth.

Now it was time to survey our ingredients- char-grilled pork, 2 eggs, 2 strips of bacon, French butter (which every sandwich should be lucky enough to be graced with), pickled carrots, cucumbers, cilantro, and jalapenos- all of which were fresh perfection. 

But we were going to need a vessel to transport all this goodness to my mouth, and a toasted French Baguette was just the ticket.

Maria was quick to let me know when I made a mistake. I could tell my uncanny natural abilities had her fearing she would be replaced. Too much pork, not enough carrots, and misplaced cucumbers were quickly corrected.

Exhausted, but relieved after 30 minutes of intense training, it was time to enjoy the fruits of our labor.

Thanks to Maria's pointers, it looked so perfect. I almost didn't want to touch it, but since I knew what it was going to taste like, I was willing to destroy this masterpiece.

At last, I got to enjoy that first earth-shattering bite of my Heart Throb. As you can see, my fear of having overcooked the eggs was unwarranted. Not Pictured: me devouring it then laying back in my chair with my stomach hanging out, unable to move and making the other patrons uncomfortable.

Yet again, Minh had found a way to give me another memorable experience at his little oasis of awesome. Thanks so much for the years of good food, great times, and ruining my expectations for every restaurant I visit in the future. I'll be lucky to find another place with half the heart in Charleston.

And now, it's time to get to know the man himself (although the best way is always walking in those welcoming doors).

An Interview with the Prime Minhister of Bánh Mì

Tell us a little about yourself. How did you end up here today?

In short, I’ve always had the entrepreneurial spirit but really had no mastery of any skilled labor. So, when an opportunity knocked where I could work next to where I live, help grow in an area w/ potential, and become self sufficient then I seized it. I went with a ‘gut’ feeling vs. a sensible one.

What's the best part of owning TH?

The best part is definitely greeting & meeting new and regular customers w/ good energy. Connecting w/ ppl some how some way makes my soul more complete.

What's the secret to a good bánh mì? Is it love? I'm betting it's love. 

It’s the love! hmmm… Quality ingredients made fresh in a timely manner.

What's your favorite bánh mì? Favorite menu item? 

Generally speaking, I really like simple foods. This constantly changes but if I had to stick w/ a tried and true one, I’d say the char-grilled chicken and tofu w/ a hint of kim chi. Wait, that seemed to be complex. Again, my favorite menu item changes day to day, but I’d have to go with the pho. It’s incredibly nutrious and can do wonders for your soul.

How were my bánh mì making skills? 

Your skills were top notch. I’d have to say that you were valedictorian of your class.

Any big plans for the restaurant in the coming year?

I always have plans but how much of it gets accomplished is another. We shall see bc if it happens, I’m sure you will notice.

What does Houston's most eligible restaurateur look for in a mate? (from Kevin and probably every single woman who has ever set foot in TH)

.

I'm pretty sure this is what heaven looks like

Hmmm…where did you get these questions from?..lol…... other than the typical traits ppl look for, I’d add: empathy, competent, assertiveness, there’s an endless list but I feel like if you know, you know. Some sort of feeling you have and it’s somewhat explainable in a few words but not really.

When will you be expanding to Charleston?

Whenever you and Robin are ready. Gimme the green light.

Anything you'd like to add?

I’d like to say that this anchorman persona is quite impressive and should put your engineering career away. Thx for being a good pal, and I hope that Houston finds you again.

Cajun Cubanos

It's rare that a movie speaks to your soul, and even rarer when it manages to hit on just about every aspect of it. The magnificent foodie-porn film Chef combined my love of cooking with both my Cuban and New Orleans heritage for the most enjoyable and fun movie I've seen in quite some time (especially impressive given that I watched it on a plane). Immediately upon seeing it, I went about convincing Kevin he had to watch it, so we could quit our jobs and open up a food truck (At least 1/3 of that equation has now been completed. Stop holding out, Kevin!).

Finally, this Sunday we got together to watch the Saints dominate the Packers and did our best to reenact the movie in our fanciest guayaberas (or at least I did).

Would our Cajun spins on the most perfect sandwich (It's grilled cheese stuffed with pork!) provide us with all the mojo we needed to enjoy the Saints game, or would we learn that it's best to stick with tradition?

With enough prodding, I'm sure I could get Kevin to wear a guayabera. I mean he did wear nothing but Hawaiian shirts when we met.

The Ingredient List

Cuban Bread (see below)
Mojo Pork (see below)
Ham (we used maple glazed honey ham)
Prosciutto
Swiss Cheese
Havarti Cheese
Olive Salad (see below)
Mojo Spread (see below)
Remoulade (Previously seen here but with cilantro in place of parsley)
Kevin's mom's homemade pickles
Momma Kennair's fried shrimp
And most importantly- butter

1. Start calculating the cost of a food truck.
2. Decide it's far too expensive and that your friend's kitchen is "just as good".
3. Determine which of these 3 awesome sandwiches deserves your mouth's immediate attention. 
4. Recreate the stack-up as shown. I recommend putting the spread you pick on both pieces of bread.
5. Combine the two sides into proper sandwich form. Slather with butter.
6. Grill in a buttered skillet over medium to medium-low heat while applying pressure with a weight. Flip and repeat. We used a heavy cast-iron cover to weigh ours down, but you could be fancy and use an actual sandwich press.
7. Embrace your Cuban heritage in the most delicious way possible.

The Traditional

The Traditional Stack-up: Bread, mojo pork, ham (3 slices), Swiss cheese (3-4 slices), pickles, and Dijon mustard.

Now this was a sandwich. Our first attempt may have just been the greatest Cuban sandwich any of us had eaten (for the next few minutes at least). The mojo pork was fantastic, and Kevin's last second audible to add cloves paid off by really bringing complexity and uniqueness to the juicy goodness. His contributions to this sandwich's success weren't over, though, as his mom's homemade pickles were spot-on (and infinitely better than any store bought pickle I've ever had). Top it all off with poweful Dijon mustard, and this was all the joy that a Cuban sandwich is supposed to be.

This sandwich looked kind of like a sad duck following grilling and cutting. 

The Cuban Muffaletta

The Cuban Muffaletta Stack-up: Bread, mojo pork, ham (2 slices), prosciutto, Havarti (4 slices), olive salad, and mojo spread.

Our first Cajun fusion attempt managed the seemingly impossible by toppling our traditional sandwich in our personal rankings. The prosciutto added some extra New Orleans worthy decadence, while the Havarti proved once and for all that it should be the official cheese sponsor of sandwiches, and the mojo spread amplified everything that made the pork special. The MVP (can you tell I'm writing this while watching the World Series), however, was the distinguishing factor of any good Muffaletta- the olive salad (I really need to figure out how to get giardiniera in my life). Marrying together the best aspects of a Cuban sandwich with those of a Muffaletta produced the gold standard for all future sandwiches, and has surely ruined us for life.

I'm jealous of this picture because it has olive salad and I do not.

The Cuban Po' Boy

The Cuban Po' boy Stack-up: Bread, mojo pork, ham (2 slices), Havarti cheese (4 slices), fried shrimp (~10),  pickles, and remoulade.

My original vision of my hypothetical Cajun fusion food truck with Kevin was the Cuban Po' Boy. As a kid, my favorite Po' Boy was always the fried shrimp, and no one made better fried shrimp than my Cuban mother (full circle fusion!). After stealing the secret family recipe she keeps locked in a safe at the bottom of a bayou (read: calling my mother), I was ready to tackle the defining food of my childhood. While the end result was quite good, they did not manage to reach the heights I'm used to as the nice mustard finish was noticeably absent, meaning I'll probably need to train under my mother's tutelage until I perfect it. The sandwich itself was still pretty great, but it suffered from an overabundance of meat (yeah, I didn't know that was possible either), making it slightly dry. Future attempts at the Cuban Po' Boy will likely need either removing one of the ham or pork, using thinner pork, or really lathering on the remoulade.

Despite being absurdly full, we found ourselves still picking out and eating all the shrimp.

Between the Saints finally looking good and non-stop amazing sandwiches, Sunday was a resounding success and surely proved beyond any reasonable doubt or logical thought that a Cajun fusion food truck needs to be in our future.

All the Recipes You'll Need

Cuban Bread
Recipe from Taste of Cuba
Servings: 4 loaves
Time: 3 hours (plus 1 day for starter)

Starter
3/4 tsp active dry yeast (1/3 envelope)
1/3 cup warm water
1/3 cup bread flour

Dough
4 1/2 tsp active dry yeast (2 envelopes)
1 tbsp sugar
1 1/2 cups warm water, divided
4 tbsp vegetable shortening, room temp
1/2 batch starter 
1 tbsp salt
4-5 cups bread flour
Kitchen twine, dampened

The best and fanciest bread I have made yet. The slightly extra work involved with making a starter really pays off.

1. The day before you plan to make the bread, mix up the starter by dissolving the yeast in the warm water. Then mix in the flour until a thick paste forms. Cover with plastic wrap and "ripen" in the fridge for 12-24 hours (the longer the better).
2. The day of, dissolve the yeast and sugar in 3 tbsp water in a large bowl. Allow 5-10 minutes for a foam to develop.
3. Mix in the vegetable shortening, remaining water, salt, and 1/2 batch of the starter you made yesterday. 
4. Be kind of sad that you still have 1/2 a batch of starter that will never see its lifelong dreams of being bread come to fruition.
5. Add flour in 1 cup at a time and mix well with the dough hook attachment on a stand mixer. Continue adding flour until you have a workable dough that is not sticky. 
6. Let the dough hook knead the dough for 6-8 minutes until elastic, or knead it yourself on a lightly floured surface.
7. Place the dough in a lightly oiled bowl, cover and let rise until it doubles (~ 45-60 minutes).
8. Separate into 4 equally sized balls. Roll out each into a long tube (~8-12 inches) and place on baking sheets spaced at least 6 inches apart. 
9. Cover with damp paper towels and let rise for another hour until they double again.
10. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
11. Place dampened pieces of twine in cool patterns on top of the dough. 
12. Bake until tops are brown and it sounds hollow when tapped (25-30 minutes), rotating once during.
13. Let cool on wire racks and remove the strings.
14. Turn into ridiculous Cuban sandwiches.

Muffaletta Olive Salad

Adapted from Cooking for Two 

Time: 5 minutes (plus a day)

3/4 cup pimento-stuffed olives
1/4-1/2 cup Kalamata olives
1/2 cup giardiniera
2 large pepperoncini
2-3 cloves garlic, minced
Black pepper to taste
Red chili flakes to taste
2 tsp fresh lemon juice
2 tbsp olive oil

1. Drain all the ingredients.
2. Chop finely, mix in the pepper, red chili flakes, lemon juice and olive oil, and refrigerate overnight to let the flavors meld.

Mojo Spread

Adapted from The Cooking Channel

Time: 5 minutes

3 tbsp mayonnaise

1 tbsp olive oil

1 tbsp cilantro, chopped

1/2 tsp salt

4 cloves garlic, minced

Juice of 1 lime

1. Mix all the ingredients together until smooth like your sweet Cuban dance moves.

Mojo Pork

Adapted from Tyler Florence

Time: 1 hour

How could that not turn out awesome?

2-3 lbs boneless pork shoulder or tenderloin

Salt

Pepper 

Red chili flakes

1 tbsp ground cumin

1 tbsp dried oregano

2 tbsp olive oil

5 cloves garlic, peeled and gently smashed

1 onion, sliced

1 cup orange juice

Juice of 1 lime

1 cup low-sodium chicken broth

2 bay leaves

Cloves

So tender and juicy and delicious

1. Cut the pork into 4-5 pieces. Season well with salt, pepper, cumin, and oregano.
2. Saute the garlic, onion, and chili flakes in olive oil in a pressure cooker on the brown setting until fragrant and soft
3. Brown the pork on all sides. 
4. Add the orange juice, lime juice, chicken broth, bay leaves, and cloves. Cover and set the pressure cooker to high for 40 minutes. 
5. Follow all the safety precautions and wait for the pressure to be released before opening. 
6. Lightly pull the pork into large, juicy chunks.

Momma Kennair's Fried Shrimp

2 eggs, scrambled

Milk

Mustard

Soy Sauce

Flour

Salt

Pepper

Garlic Powder

Cayenne Pepper

Shrimp, peeled and deveined

Oil for frying

One day I will properly honor your fried shrimp, Momma Kennair.

1. Heat oil to 375 F.
2. Mix the eggs, milk, mustard and soy sauce into one bowl and the flour and spices into another.
3. Dip the shrimp in the liquid mixture with one hand and into the powder mix with the other. Shake off excess batter.
4. Fry until golden brown (~ 2 minutes). Transfer to a plate covered in paper towels to remove excess oil.
5. You can store these in an oven set to 200 F for later if needed.

Mom's Diner: Elvis Presley's Fried Peanut Butter & Banana Sandwich

Were you really expecting a pretty picture with a name like that?

Once my sister and I both left the South, my parents were forced to find new ways to fill their time (aside from worrying about us in scary California). That special replacement something turned out to be the King himself- Elvis Presley. My mom took a break from her busy Elvis Look-Alike contest schedule to teach me about some of the highlights of his "diet". Initially, I resisted, but since the recipe came from the chef who makes me want to know what love is (the ever so dreamy Nigella Lawson), I was willing to give it a shot.

Elvis Presley's Fried Peanut Butter & Banana Sandwich

From Nigella Lawson 

Servings: 1 or how ever many people you can convince to share a fried sandwich

Time: 10 minutes

2 slices white bread

2 tbsp butter

1 small ripe banana, mashed

2 tbsp creamy peanut butter

The complicated ingredients list. Not pictured: butter.

What sandwiches were missing

1. Lightly toast two pieces of white bread.
2. Melt butter in a skillet over medium heat.
3. Spread the mashed bananas and peanut butter on your toasted bread and close the two pieces together to form a sandwich (are you still with me?). In case you're confused, the gooey stuff goes on the inside.
4. Fry the sandwich in the melted butter for about 2 minutes per side.
5. Slice in a diagonal and enjoy.

Enjoy with a nice root beer float. Just try not to be too creeped out by the glances from the Big Boy.

Right off the bat, I was a little concerned that the sandwich wasn't actually deep fried. My lofty expectations of an Elvis Presley creation were smashed. Then, I bit into the sandwich and was pleasantly surprised at how delectable it was. Peanut butter and banana is always a winning combination, but surrounding it with the crunch of our fried toast and that hint of butter really makes you just want to retire to sweat pants (or a nice sparkly jump suit) and call it a night. Along with our Abita Root Beer float, this sandwich gave me heart palpitations which I can only attribute to love, proving that anytime you can take culinary advice from a man who died on the toilet, you just have to.

My dad takes an artful picture of me eating the sandwich with my iPhone. Parents with technology are just so adorable.

The Uruguay Chivito Steak and Fried Egg Sandwich

No picture can do justice to how unbelievably tasty this sandwich with the long name was.

My love of Susan Feniger has been well documented (see Kaya Toast, Amaretto Flan and my constant desire to fly back to Los Angeles for dinner at Street), so when I heard she was coming out with a street food cookbook I immediately began to salivate at the many delicious possibilities it was going to add to my life (and cursed the fact that it was a pre-order forcing me to wait several more months). Finally, one glorious day in July, a box from Amazon appeared on my doorstep, and Nancy and I set about making a Sunday dinner of the world's messiest yet most delicious sandwich: The elusive Uruguay Chivito Steak and Fried Egg Sandwich. Now, we must sadly live in a world where all other (clearly inferior sandwiches) have been forever ruined.

The Uruguay Chivito Steak and Fried Egg Sandwich
Adapted from Susan Feniger's Street Food
Servings: 8 sandwiches (It's that good. You're going to want at least 8.)
Time: 60 minutes

Sammich
3 lbs skirt steak, cut into 1/2-1/4 inch strips
1 bunch fresh cilantro, chopped
6 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
4 tbsp whole-grain mustard
3 tsp sea salt
Olive Oil
2 red onions, thinly sliced
2 red bell peppers, cut into thin strips
8 large eggs
8 French rolls
16 slices provolone cheese
8 slices prosciutto

Golf Salsa
1/2 cup ketchup
1/2 cup mayonnaise
Juice of 1 lime

And now the moment when I finally prove to myself I can cook steak without the aid of grillmaster Kevin. Not being grossed out when handling all the raw meat is still a work in progress...

Finally a pink weapon for my culinary arsenal!

1. Preheat the oven to 400 F.
2. Marinade the steak strips in the Worcestershire sauce and mustard with the cilantro and salt. Let sit for half an hour.
3. Sauté the onions and bell pepper in olive oil over medium heat. Cook until the onions caramelize and the bell pepper becomes tender.
4. In a separate pan, sear the steak with olive oil for 3-4 minutes until browned. Try to get as much of the marinade out as possible before putting the steak into the pan.
5. Fry the eggs in olive oil or butter so that the yolks are still runny. I recommend cooking them over medium heat and covering the frying pan.
6. Slice the French rolls in half and place them cut side up on baking sheets. Place a slice of cheese on each half and bake for about 5 minutes or until the cheese melts and the rolls crisp up.
7. Whisk the ketchup, mayonnaise and lime juice together for a fun pink condiment.
8. Prep the sandwich by spreading salsa on each half of the roll, piling on steak, onions, and bell pepper. Top with a fried egg and slice of prosciutto.
9. Load up on napkins and bite into the gloriousness.

Sous chef Nancy earned herself a commemorative plaque for her part in making the world's most delicious and messy sandwich.

The sandwich in its stable, pre-bite state. Soon that plate would be mostly yellow.

I find it hard to properly describe the levels of awesomitude reached by this sandwich (mostly because every time I start thinking back to it, my brain shuts down, and I just start drooling). The results were some ingenious cross between a cheese steak and a Vietnamese banh mi. The steak was incredibly tender and had a nice kick from the Worcestershire and mustard (which led to everyone picking at the bowl of meat once they were done with their sandwiches). The caramelized onions and bell peppers added a light sweetness to the sandwich, while the Golf salsa provided a creaminess and hint of lime to liven things up. The true highlight of the sandwich, though, has to be that fried egg. Nothing beats biting into a fresh baked crispy roll and smothering a sandwich (and your hand because, hey, that's how gravity works) with a popped egg yolk. This sandwich was a huge hit with everyone as evidenced by the total silence aside from the sound of "mmm" while we were eating. Sadly, all the bread was consumed during the initial sandwich fest, so we had to be creative and make worthy taco substitutes instead to make sure the leftovers didn't go to waste (which would be considered a crime against humanity).

When you run out of bread, the leftovers make for an awesome taco (don't be put off by the seemingly out of place pink sauce). 

Sandwich connoisseur Jaime attempts to fit the entire sandwich in his mouth. His jaw is still recovering.

I really can't recommend buying Street Food enough. It's a culinary trip around the world with everything from spice mixes to desserts and drinks that will force you to expand your food horizons with plenty of specialty ingredients you never would have thought to use before.

We lost a lot of good napkins that day.

We finished off the meal with a salted lhassi with cumin and mint, but you're going to have to buy the cookbook to find out that recipe.

A Very Vegan Christmas: Muffalettas

For lunch on Christmas Eve we decided to go with the ultimate New Orleans sandwich. No, not the po-boy, but the vinegar filled olive showcase known as the muffaletta. The muffaletta is essentially the world's greatest Italian sandwich (a debatable point given Bay Cities' Godmother) topped off with the world’s most perfect olive salad. This was truly going to be a test of our vegan options if we were even going to come close to replicating this sandwich masterpiece.

The Veggie Muffaletta
Adapted from NolaCuisine.com
Servings: One comically large sandwich
Time: 24 1/2 hours (24 inactive)

1 1/2 cups green olives with pimento, minced
1/2 cup kalamata olives, pitted and minced
1 cup gardiniera, chopped
1 tbsp capers
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 tbsp oregano
1 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
3 tbsp red wine vinegar
1 tbsp green onion, thinly sliced
Salt and pepper to taste
1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
Daiya Vegan cheese
Italian Bread
Vegan Turkey (The Tofurkey brand has good fake deli meats)
Vegan Ham
Vegan Salami
Vegan Pepperoni

The delicious dichotomy of the muffaletta

1. Combine the olives, gardiniera, capers, garlic, oregano, salt, pepper, green onion, red wine vinegar and olive oil together in a ziploc bag and mix well. Let refrigerate for at least one day.
2. Preheat the oven to 350.
3. Top half of the bread with the daiya cheese and vegan meats then heat in the oven for about 15 minutes until the bread becomes crisp and the cheese begins to melt.
4. Top with the cold olive salad and cut the sandwich into quarters.
5. Cover your shirt in juice from the olive salad before realizing you need to eat over your plate.

It looks a little like Jabba the Hut to me.

The olive salad could’ve been ingested by the spoonful on its own, but it really shined as the MVP of the sandwich as it formed a seamless link between the “meat” and crunchy bread (special shout out to the gardiniera). Most of the recipes we saw called for letting the flavors meld for a week, but I think a day was the perfect amount of time. Everything in the olive salad came together nicely without becoming soggy or overly potent like would've been the case with extended time. We also cut back on the olive oil which helped propel the vinegar and kept things from getting too greasy.

The suggested serving size to ensure your stomach doesn't burst.

The only downside was remembering that we had to save room for dinner later. Seriously, this is a dish you could give to even the most skilled sandwich connoisseur, and they would have no clue it was vegan. They’d be too busy making sure they didn't choke on the giant chunk of deliciousness they just inhaled to notice. Our Christmas eve was definitely off to the right nap-inducing start after this masterful lunch. Now we just had to fight the urge to eat the remaining piece of muffaletta since our cooking extravaganza was only just beginning.