There's one food that unites both young and old, rich and poor- the almighty burger. Following the amazingness that was last week's Super Sushi Saturday, Kevin and I decided we needed to honor the world's most perfect meat based dish and our Texas sensibilities.
Burgers, extravagant amounts of fried food, mouth numbing hot sauce and the comedic genius of Stripes meant we were in for one hell of a Saturday night (I may have typed Friday accidentally because I was that tired from the week itself).
Servings: 3-4 burgers
Time: 20 mintutes
1 lb ground beef (we went 80/20 Angus)
3-4 slices cheddar, cut up additional
1/4 onion, diced
2-3 jalapenos, diced
Salt and pepper to taste
Shiner Onion rings (see below)
|Orderly chaos in one magnificent burger patty.|
- Mix the ground beef, cut up cheddar, diced onion, jalapeno, garlic powder, salt and pepper together in a large bowl. Form into 3-4 patties (we're making cowboy burgers so go big!).
- Grill the burgers to a nice medium rare (3-4 minutes per side, flipping only once).
- Top with bacon, more cheddar, onion rings (and potentially fried jalapenos) and BBQ sauce.
|Drool. Drool. Drool. Drool. Drool. Drool (Hey why doesn't my keyboard work anycocdodkdodk?)|
|While crazy stuffed, I still think we need to make it a two-hander for proper Cowboyness.|
Shiner Onion Rings (and other fried goodness)
Servings: A surprising amount
Time: 20 minutes
1 cup flour
10 oz Shiner (drink the final two ounces because Cowboys are not wasteful)
1 yellow onion, cut into rings and separated
Jalapenos cut into strips
Potatoes rinsed, dried and cut into strips
Tony Chachere's Seasoning
Peanut oil (or other if, you know, allergies)
|We bought 3 onions. This is what you get after just one. Excess achieved!|
- Preheat the oven to 200 F.
- Whisk the flour, Shiner, sriracha, black pepper, cayenne and salt together in a large bowl.
- Fill a large pot 1/3 full with the oil and heat to 370 F.
- Lightly batter your onion rings, jalapenos and/or French fries (because just frying them without batter would be far too carb-conscious for a cowboy).
- Drop whatever your heart desires into the super hot oil. Fry for 3-4 minutes, flipping once.
- Remove with a slotted spatula or spoon, and place on a plate covered in paper towels to remove excess oil.
- Sprinkle with Tony Chachere's seasoning.
- Transfer to the oven to stay warm in between batches.
|There was a mountain of fried options. We regret nothing!|
On this most glorious of food nights, I was the fry master. For the past several years, I have watched Kevin have total command of grease cooking from his wings to our recent Sapporo Tempura. At last, it was my time to shine! Since Kevin was busy manning the grill (a skill my brain needs to absorb from him soon, so I can achieve maximum manliness levels), I was working the frier to make the side dish of destiny for our burgers of transcendence (Kevin suggested this because he "works with words"). Everything from the onion rings to the jalapenos and fries were crispy and nicely seasoned, providing the ultimate sidekick to our night of being 'Murrican. Texas Forever, Street. Texas Forever.
|Onion rings aren't your only frying options. Jalapenos and the burger staple, French fries, are also ripe for the beer battering and frying.|
The Great Hot Sauce Taste Test of '14
|My new Rogue's Gallery of hot sauces.|
|The hottest of the hot.|
This was definitely a far better decision than stamps. Stay tuned for the rest of my weekend honoring Harold Ramis and the best collector of spores, molds and fungus the world has ever known with Ghostbusters and the Sunday of appreciation for the most distinguished straight-man ever. May he have received total consciousness.